Phun facts about Yana

1. like to drive really fast
2. will drive and walk whenever stressed or moody
3. making funny sounds when taking corners or bumpers
4. talkative like cannot shut up
5. dont talk harshly to her , we have tobe very polite when talking to her
6. eat alot but never get fat or big , always as skinny as taylor swift
7. cant live wo rice even in a day
8. aspect alot of super swing punches elbow uppercut from her when you tease her
9. seems loud and furious outside but really sweet adorable cute in the inside
10. she as Stubborn as a girl can get but really caring towards soulmate

My maybe YN

Last night was the best night ever
we talked about eo
get to know eo better
shared our interest
we talked till late
the stars gone and appears
we dont give a damn
i shared an intimate stories for the first time
i slept wif the biggest smile ever : clown+joker face

Today was a mess .
a text from the double Y to YN came in out of blue
saying few uncomfortable stuff and history facts
YN felt sad and guilty even i can feel it from here
she began to think of saying a good goodbye
our rutins goes slow
less calls less tex no fb feeds
even slower by hours

I couldnt care less bout her
thinking about so many things we had plan todo together
makes me happy
but looking at things at the moment
makes me hopeless

Later at night
she called and said wanna go to Ikea
just to take a walk and window shop
she likes to take a walk whenever shes stress or moody
she asked me whether i wanna go wif her
im soo glad and happy !
she havent give up on me yey
so she came and fetch me at home
actual plan was to have a futsal game
but the hell wif futsal i have better things todo
so we had the talk
explained to her the feelings and all
and so we came to an aggrement
to stay friends and cont to know eo better

This morning i was so shocked
when she told me that she feels the same way i do
we just cant stop thinking about eo
the eager to see eo is overwhelm
i feel special
she far more special
im just grateful that we have came to this state
just happy to be this happy
she brings joy in my days
her presence bring back the sparkle of life
aite gtg
shes calling now
tata !

flapjackorfervent

New Girl ( Its not the Zooey Deschanel New Girl aite )

Two weeks ago , I met a girl

A girl that looks pretty similar to her

Not the face nor body shape but it’s the inner side that got me attached

The first met was at the futsal session

She came wif her beloved sis

Looks pretty arrogant but elegant at the same time

Lucky thing I know her sis earlier

Approval from the sis and I took her for a walk

Eat talk walk are her best features

The first hang out was alright

I took her to NZ

Lot of fun talking to her

Later she took me for a walk to her home

And we talk till late

Next day we tex and talk

Next thing we skype all night

And share our favorites

The more I know into her

The more I remember the old girl

Funny cute skinny soft fair talkative crazy like her

Keep reminds me of her makes me more forlorn & gloomy

I miss the old girl and feel like cant live without her being around

But this one girl seems like a perfect match

Able to release me from the outbound state

This girl makes me happy , more like a resurrection

Able to laugh and have phun again

Maybe to her im nobody

But for me having her around is joy

Hope to get-to-know her better

Couldn’t ask anymore than this

Im so grateful just to know this adorable little angel

MODE : sparks comes again !

 

Yiyi

Yiyi is a living thing ,

and still live ,

yiyi is an adorable & dinky little boy ,

mom suggest that nick ,

dad aggreed ,

fams started to call yiyi ,

yiyi hate it but begin to like it ,

yiyi is a funny & silly kid ,

yiyi is a bully at the age of 5 – 7 but a good kid after 8 ,

yiyi gets candy , ice cream , chocs and boobs for free , what a lucky brat ,

yiyi and david grows together , undivided , soulmates for life

david is charming , a babe magnet ,

but not so  much to talk about david , so heres a fullstop right here -> . 

And now ,

another yiyi was born ,

but this yiyi is not a living thing ,

not a real boy but live to believe as he is ,

yiyi has a big cute tummy , 1 right-sided large ear , bright-glassy rounded lure eyes and short hands and legs

yiyi is made of 99% mummy & 1% daddy ,

both yiyi shares the same pure awesomeness by the name itself ,

that 1% makes yiyi an awesome kid , mummy’s precious treasure ever ,

like mummy yiyi loves to talk , eat , clowning , run fall and hurt , tell a joke , and much more ,

yiyi is a cry baby like mummy does ,

yiyi is a clingy brat 24/7 to his only mummy ,

yiyi tends to cry more around mummy ,

because he is comfortable letting mummy know when he needs something or someone , like daddy

daddy will come like a batman whenever yiyi started to call his name , or draw daddy on colorful A4 papers ,

daddy loves yiyi and so does mummy ,

mummy loves yiyi like zeus loves the human ,

mummy needs yiyi like the shark needs the ocean ,

mummy hug yiyi like she hug her mom ,

mummy kisses yiyi forehead every single day 100 times a day ,

every weekend mummy will take yiyi for a walk or shopping ,

yiyi is such a fuss and noisy during shopping ,

yiyi is more loud when he sees weird fish like keli and kembung ,

mummy is a ridiculous shopaholic girl and need yiyi to control her ,

yiyi is mummy’s fashion consultant ,

yiyi helps mummy to choose what clothes to buy & which shoes suit his dearest mummy,

yiyi is also mummy’s guardian angel ,

yiyi protects mummy when silly guys trying to nail on her ,

yiyi will make the call and threaten them and that will chicken them off ,

sometimes yiyi tells mummy what todo when mummy is lost & hopeless ,

easy say .. yiyi is the world to mummy ,

and mummy means the world to daddy ,

but just dont get to attached to things is my only advice ,

today yiyi called & said he wanted a dinosaur toy ,

so im gonna buy a t-rex for him ,

oke gtg tata ! to whoever read this crap XD

 

My heart speaks

Don’t be fooled by me.
Don’t be fooled by the face I wear for I wear a mask,
a thousand masks,
masks that I’m afraid to take off,
and none of them is me.

Pretending is an art that’s second nature with me,
but don’t be fooled, for God’s sake don’t be fooled.
I give you the impression that I’m secure,
that all is sunny and unruffled with me,
within as well as without,
that confidence is my name and coolness my game,
that the water’s calm and I’m in command and that I need no one,
but don’t believe me.

My surface may seem smooth but my surface is my mask,
ever-varying and ever-concealing.
Beneath lies no complacence.
Beneath lies confusion, and fear, and aloneness.
But I hide this.
I don’t want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my weakness exposed.
That’s why I frantically create a mask to hide behind,
a nonchalant sophisticated facade,
to help me pretend,
to shield me from the glance that knows.

But such a glance is precisely my salvation,
my only hope, and I know it.
That is, if it’s followed by acceptance,
if it’s followed by love.
It’s the only thing that can liberate me from myself,
from my own self-built prison walls,
from the barriers I so painstakingly erect.
It’s the only thing that will assure me of what I can’t assure myself,
that I’m really worth something.
But I don’t tell you this.
I don’t dare to, I’m afraid to.
I’m afraid your glance will not be followed by acceptance,
will not be followed by love.
I’m afraid you’ll think less of me,
that you’ll laugh, and your laugh would kill me.
I’m afraid that deep-down I’m nothing
and that you will see this and reject me.

So I play my game, my desperate pretending game,
with a facade of assurance without and a trembling child within.
So begins the glittering but empty parade of masks,
and my life becomes a front.
I tell you everything that’s really nothing,
and nothing of what’s everything,
of what’s crying within me.
So when I’m going through my routine
do not be fooled by what I’m saying.
Please listen carefully and try to hear what I’m not saying,
what I’d like to be able to say,
what for survival I need to say,
but what I can’t say.

I don’t like hiding.
I don’t like playing superficial phony games.
I want to stop playing them.
I want to be genuine and spontaneous and me
but you’ve got to help me.
You’ve got to hold out your hand
even when that’s the last thing I seem to want.
Only you can wipe away from my eyes
the blank stare of the breathing dead.
Only you can call me into aliveness.
Each time you’re kind, and gentle, and encouraging,
each time you try to understand because you really care,
my heart begins to grow wings–
very small wings,
very feeble wings,
but wings!

With your power to touch me into feeling
you can breathe life into me.
I want you to know that.
I want you to know how important you are to me,
how you can be a creator–an honest-to-God creator–
of the person that is me if you choose to.
You alone can break down the wall behind which I tremble,
you alone can remove my mask,
you alone can release me from my shadow-world of panic,
from my lonely prison,
if you choose to.
Please choose to.

Do not pass me by.
It will not be easy for you.
A long conviction of worthlessness builds strong walls.
The nearer you approach to me the blinder I may strike back.
It’s irrational, but despite what the books say about man
often I am irrational.
I fight against the very thing I cry out for.
But I am told that love is stronger than strong walls
and in this lies my hope.
Please try to beat down those walls
with firm hands but with gentle hands
for a child is very sensitive.

little yaya ..

its 3 in the morning and i cant sleep .. its kinda chill in here in my room . since i cant sleep i feel like writing something about whats going on with my life lately .. alot of things

families , studies , love , ah i think im gonna write a lil bit of a love story ..

its been 10 months since i know this girl and im still trying to understand her alot more better ..

shes only ~5 feet 2 tall and weighted 38kg or 83 lbs , they call her the cute and ever .. yaya and shes my ONLY girlfriend !   

well , i had phun loving this girl . shes so cute and damn funny and adorable and a supercry baby and stubborn and hyper active and clumsy and a laughing machine and a mad scientist and a happy go lucky girl .. and did i mention that shes loves to talk she cant stop talking theres always stories that she wanted to shares with me .. and she doubled up the talking velocity when shes in trouble like got lost in the city or mistook a train station , when im answering her call i’ll prepare myself for the sign of the end of my days    but honestly i love to hear all of her stories with her mincing pampered tone its really like a .. like a morphine to me putting us to sleep in one shot . shes the gossip girl in her jiggly group i guess . and last but not least she has this habits of biting people .. isk what a spoiled corrupted little girl hehe .. but in a good way tho ..

she loves decorating . shes really into it . i found that she has this talent on decorating gifts and toys and bedrooms and shes also good at editing pictures , surprisingly .. hehe . most of the gift she gave me were decorated nicely and neat she also made it colorfool and furnishes them with
tons of cool and funky stickers on the cards . somemore shes good in writing .. everytime theres an event or special moment between us she will write a poem , comes straight from the bottom of her heart and its really making me flattered .

oh she has this really old-looking mud-colored teddy bear that she always bring everywhere she go .. that stinky old heck teddy is named freddy or just fred . for me that name freddy is just a freakin retarded name coz it reminds me the horror movie character freddy krueger , i prefer jason voorhees haha .. but she eat with him study with him travel with him cry with him and even shares pillow with him .. wth ? i mean its just a teddy bear .. im his boyfriend dont get that kind of special treatment , haish how i wish i can be fred even for just a night .. but if i do it would be a hell of a night ! 

she loves to pinch me at my chick and biting its really annoys me but i dont really mind since she loves doing that awkward habits .. as long as she happy im happy too .. im suppose .

despite of her being happy go lucky , she also has her own problems , usually family stuff . she always shares the stories of her step mom and the whole family with me and how she wish she can be happy without all the mess stumping her down underneath .. sometimes i get confuse her stories with one of those fairy tales thus appoint she is the princess .. XD

she has alot of things on her wishlist , tons , like a 30 pages long .. such as traveling to Venice , Paris , doobye last year i took her to Singapore and Cameron hehe since im also facing financial problem all the time especially when my parents decide to stop paying me the pocket money .. it ‘ll take some times for us to reach there hun .. nway yaya always wanted to try her best and trying to break those limits by doing pretty xtreme activities such as bungee jumping wall climbing jet skis and many more but im kinda ‘worryless’ because eventho shes small in size but bic in spirit ! but i dont want her muscle to be unleashed for doing those activities i’ll freak out . seems like she wants to prove that shes not weak as her appearance tell us all . oh she wants a wedding dress like the one in the movie Bride Wars wore by Anne Hathaway or Giselle’s in Disney’s Enchanted . what a taste . she also wish for a brand new car so that she can lift her nose up to me and start picking me up where ever i am and when ever she wanted . she wants a house called home like one of those teen celebrities cribs you know has a jacuzzi indoor pool ping pong table mini cinema inside the house bla3 as for me i wish i can have a house like batman or even iron man what a living architectures ! but where can i find Alfred as the housekeeper , really . as for now i can see that she wants a samsung Corby as her nu mobile phone its kinda cool and funky looking and the features are quite good .

shes also a shopaholic .. hurmm evrytime we hanging out her sharp eyes surely caught on some bags or dresses or jeans or even accessories im glad she doesnt own a credit card , yet .. if she does .. fuhh . nway her sense of fashion is quite good not bad at all ! haha ..

the only thing that i might regret is not smiling much every time we dated .. have to work on it  hehe .

holly shite its almost 5 ? wutta no wonder my fingers feeling numb and my vision are gettin darker i guess Morpheus has summoned me to join his wet partay in the luxurious dreamland .. but i have so many things in mind right now ! ahh .. fuck it im going to bed tata !

p.s. yaya if you reading this i’d like to say i love you and thx !

chow ..

Officially my song of the month !

my mind cant stop playing this song in my head and my lips are moving rapidly like reading the lyrics all day long .. someone please come shut this fucking radio off .. but nway the song called time , by cute is what we aiming for . the band name is totally fuck up . hehe .. its been a while since i know this band but din have the chance to write something about it .

if you guys wanna hear them below is the download link for the song :

http://www.mp3raid.com/search/download-mp3/2419759/cute_is_what_we_aim_for_time.html

chow ..

woaa .. its almost 2 years ?

its been a while since i check out my blog infact i even forgot my username for this blog , haish my memory increasingly turning rusty .. maybe too much of porn ? too much of head banging ? or idk too much of studies ? ngehee .. nway i hope i have the chance in writing some post up here . so bubye for now whoever read this ..

tata ..

i got bitten by a croc

today at Mid Valley’s parking lot i got bitten by a croc, a black croc with a red strap on it.. i think its size is 8 metre long and weight ~6 tons.. so once it bite me, i graped it and put it inside a plastic bag, because of im a strong guy it din leave a single scratch on me, ahahhaha.. it forced me to  open both my back windscreen to place it into my car, every1 keep staring at me.. ishh.. why bring back dat fat ass reptile with u.. ahh beat it, then after i reached home i showed it to my dad.. he said “well done son ! gud catch !!”, then i asked my mom “hows my catch? ok? “& she said “urmp.. nice.. can i touch it? it wont bite isit?” then my bro accidentally got bitten by my croc and he felt high.. then he asked my mom to go to the place i got this croc.. and he actually  found 1 & bring it home 2gether.. now we have 2 crocs in our home.. n i might need to change to a bigger bed wif my croc..

things that i hate & like..

i like..

myself

my phone

my notebook

my parents

my brothers

eat

hang out

kicking

girls

drink

nike

rbk

girls wearing in black

girls who wear pink

my chemical romance

saosin

muse

the used

avril lavigne

AFI

Cranberries

SOAD

fool around

driving

bowl

batting cages

arcade

chinese

watching movie

buy things w/out thinking

spent all my savings every month

blonde

man utd

calculation

nouvo

sony vaio

my friend Sabrina when we was in form2

my cl-ass mate Diyana when we was in strd 6.

drawings

and so much more.. this is what i can come up with rite now..

i hate ..

vegetables

dirty

liar

hypocrite

slow

fat

crying

jew

girls who playing wif my heart (fuck you bitch!!)

swimming

my faculty cafe’

those who saying bad things bout me behind my back

kids

cows milk

liwat (f*** in the ass) – i mean among men

my college toilets

minah tudung

desperate housewives

kasumi

alot of home work

and so much more.. more than what i like..

ok.. i think thats it, i cant think of any other else .. maybe later i’ll continue.. or maybe not.. bcoz now i really dont have anything to do..

ohh wait ! theres more !

i hate strict guard at UM

i hate UM system that charge me $$$ coz i din approve / authenticate / confirm or whatever .. my subjects in the begining of a semester..

ok really thats it..

ohh

i read the papers every day , i like what i like , i hate what i hate , but i also easily swayed ..

hahaha.. there goes my 2-hours wasting for this shit..